Going back to college will take away some fairly large chunks of time you’ve been spending with family and friends. It does not mean you will not have time for them. In fact, if you run a time audit - how you currently spend your time – you can probably make a few adjustments and come up with plenty of time for all concerned.
It’s crucial, though, that you talk with them and explain what it is you’re doing and why. You’re going to need their co-operation and support, especially in the early stages when you’re still getting your bearings, adapting to a steady stream of time-consuming assignments (reading critically, writing clearly and concisely), dealing with random bouts of confusion and uncertainty, and the ubiquitous ogre of isolation.
One of my neighbors was worried that going back to college would automatically lead to neglecting the kids and house. Instead, she explained to them that she was going back to college to earn her bachelors and masters degree so she could re-enter the workforce once they are grown; that it would demand a lot of time from her to complete all the requirements; and that meant she wasn’t always going to be on call for them 24/7 as she had been in the past. She explained to them where and how they could work with her, that would mean more time she could concentrate on her studies without interruption, and thus more ‘quality’ time she would have to spend with them.
The first year was a bit rocky, but this year, barely a month into the new school year, things are running like clockwork! They have a calendar on the refrigerator with school events, etc., and worked out a round-robin rotation schedule for helping mom with the household chores that they came up with themselves. The oldest girl (14) has been going with mom to the grocery every week, learning to select perishables for the next week and has long since graduated from hamburgers and hot dogs, frozen dinners, pasta with bottled sauce, and take-out – which is more than I can say from a LOT of graduate students I know living off campus! That’s three meals a week mom doesn’t have to worry about rushing home from classes to cook for the family!
As long as you’re open and above-board about it in advance, your friends are going to feel slighted if you can’t make it to every ballgame or whatever. Being too closed mouthed about it can lead them to think you’re just making excuses at the last minute or that you’ve already thrown them under the bus and couldn’t be bothered with telling them.
At the other end of the spectrum, having talked with your friends about returning to college, it’s less of an imposition if you find you need to ask an extraordinary favor sometime when you get into a jam.
